Aqua biking (Hill Top Cafe, Rackheath)

Hill Top Cafe,

Rackheath,

Opening times Mon-Fri 07:00-14:00,

Sat-Sun 08:00-14:00

Yesterday's ride with guests Chris (wife) and Barry and Helen (and their Tandem) had been in the diary for sometime but due to the dodgy looking weather forecast many e-mails (tandem riders don't seem to text) had been shared to decide if it should go ahead. Just as it looked like the ride would be called off the sky's cleared and all looked set fair for a lovely cycle. However by the time we had met at the start point the weather gods had clearly tricked us as the sky's had re-darkened and it had started to drizzle. The weather gods then really rubbed it in as the further we rode the heavier the rain got. Ha Ha weather gods, very funny.

We were soon taking part in a new hybrid sport of bike and canoeing, known as banoeing. As puddles spread across the road you had to decide if to ride through or walk round as in each puddle you could hit a hidden pot hole or fall off if the water was too deep. The winner of baneoing is the one with the wettest feet when measured at the cafe stop.

Today's cafe was the Hilltop cafe at Rackheath. I was keen to go here as it is open from 6:30, which is the earliest I can find in Norfolk and could be a good early stop on my world record 'cafe visits in one day' attempt later this year (See post Will it be a record?).

On arrival we ignored the tables in the under cover out door seating area and dripped our way inside hanging all our wet jackets, gloves and shoes across several tables.

Cold and wet in the Hilltop Cafe undercover outdoor seating area

The Hilltop cafe is only small but they seemed very friendly despite us turning their indoor seating area into a Chinese laundry. The sign outside had said breakfast, lunch and home-made cakes so I was very exciting at what the cake selection might offer. Sadly the only home-made cakes available were Norfolk shortbread (a biscuit), apple and date crumble (a desert) and sausage roll (a savoury snack) so strictly speaking no home-made cakes. Worse still there was no mention of hot chocolate on the menu. This combination could void the cafe according to cycle/cafe rating rules (see post There must be rules!). However fortunately hot chocolate was available after all and the apple and date crumble looked a bit like flapjack (which counts as a cake) so ratings and reviewing could now happen.

I ordered Hot chocolate and 'flapjack' (apple and date). Chris, Barry and Helen all ordered filter coffee (which they all thought was good coffee) as their guest drinks but Barry and Helen's tandem decided to pass on a drink and wait for us outside. As Chris, Barry and Helen were all cold, wet and hungry they went for the full English breakfast as their cake option. 

Hilltop cafe English breakfast (minus black pudding) which is not a cake!

English Breakfast is defiantly not cake! So I excluded them from playing any further part in rating the Hilltop Cafe. However the fry up's were really good. The 'flapjack' (date and apple) was nice but I would have preferred something a little more cakey.

It was now time to see who had won baneoing, and it quickly became clear that Chris was a natural as she was able to wring gallons of water out of her socks while the rest of us had just got damp footwear. We didn't even need Arthur Ellis's dip stick to declare her the winner. For some reason the news of her victory did not cheer her up as she continued to mutter about being cold and wet and stupid blogs.

The Hilltop cafe is a nice friendly cafe for a cycle stop but aimed more at the fry up market then the coffee and cake brigade. 

The weather gods were kinder to us on the way home with no further rain and only a strong head wind to contend with. 

As an aside. 
My Blog is all about the best cafes, or tearooms, for Hot chocolate, hot drinks and home-made cakes when on cycle rides. For those who prefer breakfast at their cafes then you might be interested in 'the fry up inspector' blog which also seems to be Norfolk cafe focused. Here is the inspectors view of Hilltop Cafe Rackheath  The fry up inspector Hilltop cafe review

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.0	7.0	3.0	6.0	6.0	5.6

Will it be a record?

I have just contacted the Guinness book of world records people to ask if I can set a record for most cafes visited on a calorie neutral bicycle ride as below.

I'm a keen cyclist and cafe/tearoom visitor. I have recently been trying to visit as many cafes on my bike in Norfolk as I can. I would therefore like to set a record of visiting as many as possible on a single bike ride. However I feel a visit needs to include a hot drink and piece of cake. Therefore the rule on this ride is that the next cafe cannot be visited until all the calories from the last have been burnt.I calculate an average cake and hot chocolate is 400 calories so these must be cycled off before the next cafe stop. I reckon a good cyclist would do this in about half an hour over about 9-10 miles. I think a world record target of 15-20 cafes on a single ride would be challenging as that would involve about 200 miles cycling fast, eating 20 bits of cake plus 20 hot drinks, planning the optimum route, finding cafes open at right times etc
I will measure it with a pulse/calorie counter showing 400 calories have been burnt before each cafe stop, photo evidence at each cafe of calories burnt and sign off from cafe that I ate the cake and drunk the drink.
I'm doing this as I want to promote cycling as i'm very keen to encourage people to get out on their bikes. I am 50 but pretty fit as I do marathons and iron-man triathlons.

I should hear back from them in about 12 weeks to see if they will authorise this (or a variation) as a record. Fingers crossed.

A bit Windy. (Heydon shop and tearoom)

Heydon Shop and Tearoom,

Heydon,

Wed-Sun 10:30-16:30,

Highly Recommended

The original blog below was written in January 2014 but I have returned on more than one occasion to find things are consistently good except for the cake which unbelievably gets better on each visit. The latest trip was June 2016 on a beautiful day with 5 other cycling guest who were also all very impressed.

2016 cycling guests about to be impressed by Heydon Tearooms

But here is what I found the first time I blogged about it
Due to the festive season and bad weather, cycle cafe and teashop reviewing had been on hold for the last two weeks. Fortunately there appeared to be a window of weather opportunity this morning, albeit a very windy one, to get 2014 ratings under way. I was joined by cycling guests Andrew (who is notoriously hard to please) and Chris (Mrs Crusader) as we started the ride from the driveway of hard to please house in Alysham. Due to the windy conditions we decided on a shortish ride to the Heydon shop and tearoom. This had scored particularly well on a hot day last summer (pre blog) so I was keen to see how it performed in more Wintery conditions.

Although it was very windy it was also rather mild but Chris had dressed up for an Arctic expedition. This meant that every few minutes she removed some item and handed it to me to carry (headband, inner gloves, outer gloves, scarf etc.) as apparently this was my job. I stuffed them into every available pocket.

We set off with the wind slightly behind but it was not long before we were being buffeted from the side before meeting the wind full on. This would have been an excellent opportunity to see if the wind tunnel tested design that had allegedly made my bike super drag resistance had worked. Unfortunately any attempt to do this was ruined due to me now being the size of Mr Blobby thanks to all the excess clothing accessories I was carrying, and Mr Blobby has a large drag coefficient.

As we approached Heydon we cycled past a fellow cyclist who had stopped and was photographing the hedge with his phone camera. He didn't see us coming and was startled when we gave him a cheery hello. He had the guilty look of a man caught in the act of doing something very naughty. I can only think he must have stopped for a comfort break and likes to take a photo of where he has been. Maybe he has a cycle comfort break rating blog I need to check out. (I did, he doesn't)

Standing in Heydon Shop and Tearoom outdoor seating area trying not to be blown away

We arrived at Heydon shop and tearoom to find we were the only customers so could take the prime window seat. The outdoor seating area was tempting but I was worried any cake we ordered might get blown away.

View of Heydon green from teashop outdoor seating area June 2016

Although the cake selection was not huge and no chocolate cake there were a number of tempting looking ones so I awarded a good effective cake selection score (ECS).

Cake selection. All very tempting.

Note on the June 2016 visit there were more cakes including a chocolate and Strawberry one described by two of my guests as the best chocolate cake they had ever had.

June 2016 selection

Along with my hot chocolate I ordered Coconut and Blueberry cake, Andrew cappuccino and data and apple slice and Chris semi skinny mocha and lemon sponge. I tried all 3 of our selected cakes and they were all excellent. Andrew thought his coffee was brilliant (and he is notoriously hard to please), Chris thought her coffee very good but I was disappointed with my hot chocolate as it was rather weak. As all the other ratings were high an extra spoonful of chocolate powder could have moved the Heydon shop and tearoom to the top of the ratings league (unfortunately hot chocolate has remained weak on all visits). Regardless this is one of my favourite teashops and I expect there will be many return visits (there have been).

I can't remember if I mentioned it was windy, but it was. However we had the wind behind on the way back so we returned to Hard to Please house in double quick time.

Cafe ratings for Heydon shop and tea room based on last 3 visits of 7. the last was 4th November 2021

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.07	8.33	8.48	9.03	9.13	8.21

See also Sportive 5
Map of route taken in 2016

Click link to download 41 mile Norwich Heydon loop gpx file for your gps

You didn't see me, right! (The Coffee Shop, Wymondham)

The Coffee Shop,

Wymondham,

Opening times Mon-Sat 09:00-16:30

Yesterday I was able to squeeze in one last ride before Christmas. It had to be a quickie as my guest, Big George, had to get back in time to prepare for their Annual Christmas drinks party. Mrs Big George was at work and didn't know he was sneaking out to play with me instead of doing his pre party chores. So it was a hush hush operation.

As we were in a hurry we set off far too fast and got to today's destination, the rather imaginatively named 'The Coffee Shop' in Wymondham, gasping for breath.

Standing by covered outside seating area. After locking bikes with Alarmio.

Once again it was good to see an outside seating area provided. This one was also completely undercover making it possible to have a hot drink whilst enjoying expansive views of the Wymondham one way system even in the wettest of conditions. 

On entering, the décor was slightly tired but at least there was a token bit of tinsel to give a slightly festive feel. Sadly there was no sign that the mini Father Christmases had made their way down from Holt to give it a proper Christmas feel.  (see Spoiled for choice). 

The cake selection was rather scone rich. There were a few other cakes but none looked that tempting and looking round all the other punters had all gone down the scone route. I could therefore only award a below average effective cake selection rating.

I ordered hot chocolate and cheese scone and Big George Cappuccino and cheese scone. Both our drinks were nice as were the scones but overall not a cafe I'll be rushing back to. I think the cafe is targeted more at the shopper and all fans of Norfolk market town traffic calming systems, rather than the cyclist.

As a result of our ride Big George said he won't have time to make the normal Christmas canapés that he has become famous for, which was disappointing news. We spent the way home coming up with excuses for him to tell Mrs Big George as to why there would be no canopies tonight and decided the best would be that the dog ate them. It was only when I arrived at the drinks party I remembered they didn't have a dog and we were rumbled. 

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.0	7.0	4. 5	6.5	5.5	5.90

Map of Route

View 28 mile Norwich Wymondham loop in a larger map

Click here to down load 28 mile Norwich Wymondham loop GPX file for your GPS

Spoiled for choice. (Horatio Mugs, Holt)

Horatio Mugs,

Holt,

Opening times Mon-Sat 9-5, Sun 10-4,

Recommended 

This morning I set off to 'Notoriously hard to please' Andrew's house in Aylsham for a ride. When Andrew is in charge of 'planning' then the route, ride distance, destination etc aren't confirmed until just after they have happened. I was therefore surprised when he suggested we went to Holt and then claimed he had done some Holt cafe based research on his laptop. I was impressed until it materialised that the Holt cafe based research on his laptop had only confirmed that there were, in fact, cafes in Holt, a fact I was already aware of. Sadly his Holt cafe based research on his laptop had not managed to actually decide on which one to go to. I had recently been told that Horatio Mugs in Holt was worth a visit so we set off there.

It was a glorious crisp December morning ideal for a pre Christmas cycle making it a very enjoyable ride to Holt only spoiled by Andrews internet rant. He was complaining about the number of out of date cafe reviews he had come across blaming this on his failure to be able to pick a cafe venue. 'Who is responsible for keeping these things up to date!' He asked me.This somehow led on to a moan about what will happen when the web cloud thing fills up due to irresponsible people storing their rubbish photos, that they would never look at again, in the virtual world. All excellent points but I wasn't sure why he was telling me as I couldn't do anything about it myself (although I am aware of a very useful up to date cafe review based blog, that would solve part of his problem).

We arrived at Horatio Mugs in Holt and I asked Andrew to take a photo for me. He unnecessarily took several which are even now further clogging up the web cloud thing!

Outside Horatio Mugs in the 'thin people only' outside seating area.

I was glad to see that Horatio Mugs had an outside eating area but, as you can see in the photo, it only seemed suitable for very thin people. It did, however, provide an excellent viewing point for Holt's one way system but we decided to leave that excitement for another day and sit indoors. Inside there was a nice warm and lively atmosphere with a choice of an informal (sofas) or formal (table and chairs) area. We went informal.

On entering I was immediately struck by the enormous number of cakes available most of which I would like to try. The cakes were very large and I had no choice but to awarded the highest effective cake selection (ECS) rating to date of 9.75. 

Vast and tempting cake selection.
 I had to push past the mini father Christmases in the queue as they
were taking too long deciding on their cake choice.

The second best ECS was Byfords of Holt, which is about 100 yards away. They obviously like their cake in Holt, which probably explains why the thin people only out door seating area was empty.

I ordered Hot chocolate and carrot cake (I really wanted the chocolate and banana cake but for reviewing purposes went for a tearoom staple) and Andrew went cappuccino and almond slice. The cakes were good, although we both agreed the cake was better than the slice, and I wished I could have tried some others. Andrews coffee was fine but unfortunately the hot chocolate wasn't as it had lots of very hot milk and very little chocolate. This was a shame as apart from the hot chocolate the rest of the experience was very good and I'm sure to come back again and try a different cake. 

On the way back we were overtaken by a grouse shooting party setting off in their land rovers. This sent Andrew off on another rant about posh toffs pointlessly shooting innocent slow moving birds. But it pasted the time as we sped back enjoying the fabulous Norfolk country side albeit minus a bit of wildfowl. 

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
4.5	6.0	9.75	8.0	7.5	7.15

Route

Click here to download 32 Mile Alysham Holt loop GPX file for your GPS

Cold comfort (The Courtyard Cafe. Wymondham)

Courtyard Coffee Shop,

Wymondham,

Opening times Mon-Sat 09:00-16:00

On my last ride (A matter of taste) Big George recommended I try the Courtyard Cafe in Wymondham, a more down to earth cafe with no Victorian waiters to freak him out. So despite the chilly weather I set of on a ride with today's guests, Chris (wife) and Barry and Helen and their tandem, to try it out.

Due to the freezing fog my hands were very cold and I found myself cursing Father Christmas. Santa had let it be known that he couldn't think of anything he thought I would like to find in my festive stocking this year. I had therefore written to him suggesting that inner cycle gloves would make an excellent Christmas gift and although I had been planning to buy a pair I would wait in order that he could give me a present. I was now thinking this was a bad idea as by Christmas I would probably have got frost bite and have had a number of my fingers amputated. This would not only mean the inner gloves will no longer fit but would rendered the gift useless causing me to have to think of an alternative one. 

Despite the onset of hypothermia, Chris was also struggling with very cold feet, we arrived safely at The Courtyard Cafe in Wymondham.

Outside The Courtyard Cafe. It was much colder than it looks

The outside seating area overlooks the carpark and was far too cold for today so we went straight inside. While the others found a seat  I checked the cake selection. Carrot or coffee cake and fruit or cheese scone. Not a huge selection but all looked nice giving an average effective cake selection score. I ordered hot chocolate and cheese scone, Chris skinny mocha and fruit scone, Helen skinny mocha and Barry cappuccino.

It was at this point Chris came up with her new invention to warm up feet. Scloves or was it Glocks.

First ever photo of Scloves/Glocks in action

This was the brilliant idea of putting her gloves on her feet. Chris seemed to think this would quickly warm her toes up and was very excited when the feeling soon returned to each foot. She was quickly on her smart phone looking for the application form for dragons den and would not listen to the possibility that sitting by the radiator was probably the true reason for her warm toes. On the positive side if anyone is going to a poultry based fancy dress party then she maybe onto something.

The scones and drinks were all good and were just what we needed to fuel us for the return journey. The Scloves/Glocks were returned to Chris's hands, which she claimed demonstrated their multifunctional use, (or only use) and we set off home in order to warm up again.

For the latest ratings of the many cafes I have so far rated see the table at the bottom of the blog.

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.5	7.0	5.5	6.5	6.5	6.40

Map of Route

Click here to download 28 mile Norwich Wymondham loop GPX file for your GPS

A matter of taste. (The Tally Ho Tearooms, Mettingham nr Bungay)

Tally Ho Tearooms,

Mettingham,

Opening times Tue-Sat 10:00-17:00,

Sun 11:00-17:00,

 Recommended

Yesterday I broke the golden rule of cycling. Always cycle into the wind on the way there and with the wind, when you are tired, on the way back. However as I was so keen to visit a new tearoom, The Tally Ho Tearoom at Mettingham nr Bungay, I ripped up the cycle rule book and rode off, with today's guest Big George, at a lighting pace with the wind behind.

As a result, and despite a puncture stop, we arrived at the Tally Ho Tearoom in good time. 

About to lock up (with Alarmio) and enter tearoom

Big George is, Scottish, loves his rugby and nicely fits the rest of that particular stereo type. The Tally Ho Tearooms is Victorian themed (including staff dressed up in period costume), has a pink based décor and sells jam. Individually the two things work well but when brought together they cause a rift in the fabric of reality. It soon became clear that rugby loving Scotsmen and period tearooms are not good bedfellows .

Partly due to the rift in the fabric of reality and partly because we were the only people in the rather large indoor seating area, an uncomfortable atmosphere descended and we found ourselves talking in whispers. I was therefore pleased to go and examine the cake selection. There were all the cakes you would expect (carrot, coffee, chocolate, brownie etc) and even a mini triple cake selection.

In drinks terms there was a choice of white and normal hot chocolate. I went for normal hot chocolate a cheese scone and chocolate cake. Big George seemed confused and ordered a pot of tea (and cheese scone) rather than his normal cappuccino. I asked him why and he explained he didn't think they had cappuccino in the 19th century (despite it being on the menu). I had to point out that we hadn't actually gone back in time, it was just pretend. Things only got worse when his tea turned up on a full china tea service, as you can see below.

Big George struggling to come to terms with Victorian theme and china tea set

The drinks and cakes were all very good and scored well, however there was an obvious problem with the ambiance rating as it wasn't really to his taste, I think it will take Big George sometime to recover from the experience so I have promised to take him to a cafe where he can have a mug of tea and full English breakfast next time (although I never have).

On the way home Big George announced we had a deadline as he had to buy a new hoover and clean the house before guests arrived. This led to an enjoyable chat comparing notes and tips on which we thought the best cleaner was and our personal vacuuming experiences. As a result Big George decided a purple ball Dyson was his best bet. As proper men we vowed never to speak of this conversation again. 

We battled through the wind to get Big George back in time to do whatever it was he needed to do.

Despite the excellent fair at the Tally Ho Tearooms I'm not sure I will ever get Big George back there but if I bump into any Victorians I will certainly recommend they go there for tea.

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
8.5	6.0	7.5	7.5	5.0	6.90

This is the route

Click here to download 43 miles Norwich - Bungay loop  GPX file for your gps