Speak to my people (No 5. Harleston)

No 5 has now closed

No 5,

Harleston,

Open Tue-Sun 7:30-3:00,

 Recommended

Yesterday I cunningly planned to set off slightly later than normal for my cafe cycle ride in order not to miss out on the partial eclipse action that the press had been promising me. This turned out to be a complete waste of time and unnecessarily delayed today's important trip. I have made a note in my diary for August 12th 2026 so that I won't be taken in by Professor Brian Cox and his sciencey friends again when the next eclipse is due. My ride planned for that day will be leaving on schedule.

Partial eclipse non event photo

Once I had got over my partial eclipse disappointment thoughts turned to today's ride which was going to be a double whammy. First, as a result of last weeks calorie neutral world record bike practice ride (see so much to learn) I had decided that I needed to included a stop in Harleston to optimise my planned route. Secondly, you may remember, another one of my projects is to go to a cafe named No 1 to No 100. So far I have done No 7 and No 51 so this project could take sometime to complete. Therefore when I discovered there was a cafe called No 5 in Harleston I felt I had to go and try it out as soon as possible. For this ride I was joined by cycling guest Big George.

Recently Big George has become increasingly unhappy about the way he has been portrayed in this blog. He feels I have challenged his macho image by suggesting he has a passion for housework and often fades at the end of our rides. He has decided to take legal action to re-establish his image as a tough, ex Rugby playing, super fit, beer drinking Scotsman. Currently his people are talking to my people to see if we can come to an out of court settlement so he has been advised not to talk to me about dusting, hoovering or ironing and to make sure he keeps up on the ride. He followed this advise and only superficial small talk was exchanged on the route down to Harleston.

We found No 5 on the main road that runs through Harleston which meant there was no outdoor seating area available. Inside was smartly decorated although Big George was not keen on the flower baskets hanging from the ceiling as they were not in keeping with his hard man image. 

Outside No. 5 

We choose a table by the window and next to the cake selection meaning I could award the effective cake selection (ECS) rating from my chair. The selection looked very good with a number of large cakes available. I awarded a high ECS score.

Good cake selection

Big George had been advised by his people not to pander to this cake reviewing nonsense and to have something more Scottish and unhealthy. So, although not on the menu, he asked for a fried egg sandwich on white bread with no garnish, which is clearly not a cake so he would not be involved in any cake rating activity today.

Double egg sandwich on white no garnish and not cake

Despite his deliberately provocative action I was not to be put off my normal reviewing pattern and started with the largest cheese scone I have ever seen (which came correctly warmed) followed by a piece of green pistachio cake, which looked very green and interesting.

Enormous cheese scone and drinks

My hot chocolate was very good and scored well but Big George felt his Cappuccino was a bit weak although had a good flavour. Considering it's size the enormous cheese scone was very good and managed to maintain it's cheese flavour throughout. My cake was nice enough but considering the excellent colour it was not nearly as pistachio flavoured as I had expected.

Very green pistachio cake

No 5 was a very nice cafe and, although not part of my rating system, had a very good menu with large portions. It scored well across all categories so worth a visit.

On the way back it was obviously that Big George was very pleased with himself and felt he was clearly restoring his macho image. With his guard down I managed to extract from him his plans for the rest of the day. He was going to spend the afternoon on some serious hoovering which he would follow up with a nice relaxing bath using his favourite bath salts, and may be a few scented candles. As we approached Mulbarton Big George started to drop off the pace and I had a long wait at the next junction. When he eventually caught up he claimed he had stopped for a quick comfort break, although I expect his people told him to say that. Hopefully our legal differences will be sorted out before the next ride or we end up riding in silence several miles apart.

Ratings

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
7.75	6.0	8.0	7.0	7.0	7.15

Map of route


Click here to down load 43 mile Norwich Harleston loop GPX file for your GPS