Climbing practice. (Rocket House Cafe, Cromer)

Rocket House Cafe,

Cromer,

Opening times Mon-Fri 09:00-17:00,

Sat-Sun 10:00-17:00,  

Recommended 

As a keen cyclist one thing I really enjoy is watching the cycling on the telly, especially the mountain stages in the Grand Tours. I particular remember watching the last stage of the 2014 Giro (tour of Italy) when they went up monte Zoncoln which is considered one of the hardest climbs in Europe. I foolishly thought that I would like a go at it just to see how hard it is. Well in just 6 weeks time myself and Andrew (who is notoriously hard to please) will be giving it a go as a result of an ill thought through conversation last year. 

Monte Zoncolon that doesn't look much like Norfolk

With this in mind I decided it was probably about time we did some hill climbing training but as Norfolk isn't renowned for it's mountains then finding somewhere appropriate isn't easy. In fact the only place with any gradients is the Cromer ridge (near Cromer) so that's where we headed today.

After leaving from Hard to Please House and with rain in the air, we cycled for about 20 miles before finding ourselves at the start of the planned training climb in West Runton. Andrew wisely suggested we remove our waterproofs so we didn't over heat on the way up which obviously meant that it started to rain for the only time all day. I set the gradient'o'meter function on my cycle computer to see how steep the hill got as we went up. As we climbed I shouted out the latest steepness reading, 9%,10%, 11% until we maxed out at 12 % on our half mile ascent. 

Looking back down our impressive training climb

Probably due to my London marathon training (did I mention I was running the London Marathon) at the top I said to a panting Andrew that, I didn't want to sound arrogant or patronising, but I hadn't found the climb very difficult. Andrew confirmed that I had sounded very arrogant and patronising and turned down my suggestion of going round again meaning our climbing training was now complete. Wet from the rain we put our waterproofs back on, just as the rain stopped, and headed straight for Cromer and today's cafe the Rocket House, which we found on the sea front.

Outside the Rocket House cafe

After locking our bikes we climbed the two flights of stairs (gradient unknown) up to the cafe area. The outside seating area has stunning views of the sea and pier but we opted to join the masses and reserve one of the last remaining lunchtime tables.

View out from outdoor seating area

As always I first checked out the cake selection in order to award the effective cake selection (ECS) score. It was spread out at the front and back of the counter with a number of good looking cakes so I awarded a good solid ECS mark.

Cake selection mainly on back shelf

I went for chocolate cake to go with my hot chocolate and Andrew millionaire shortbread to accompany his cappuccino. There was also flapjack which I purchased to test as part of my flapjack of the year 2016 competition.

The drinks and cakes soon arrived. I thought my hot chocolate a bit weak, especially compared to the run of hot chocolates made from real chocolate chips that I have had at several cafes recently. Andrew found his cappuccino to be a reasonably good example so I scored both the drinks appropriately.

Drinks nicely presented

On the cakes front my chocolate cake had some of the best chocolate topping I can remember. It was thick and a good chocolate taste with out being at all sickly like some icings can be. Andrew liked his millionaire shortbread but would have liked the shortbread bit to be a bit shorter.

Cakes ready to taste, with chocolate cake having a great topping

Although not cake, so forming no part in my cycle cafe rating system, I must report how much I enjoyed my lunchtime Cromer crab sandwich and chips which was the best crab sandwich I can remember and I'm very found of a bit of crab.

Fabulous crab sandwich

All in all the Rocket House cafe had proved a very good stop with the stunning views making it something special and I recommend a visit.

After the success of our half a mile of climbing training we decided to take the quick way back to Alysham before I drove back to Norwich for a quick afternoon nap, happy in the knowledge that if we can climb the Cromer ridge (0.5miles max gradient 12%) then Monte Zoncolon (6.5 miles average gradient 12%) will be a piece of cake, and I like cake.

Scores

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.00	6.50	7.00	7.50	8.50	7.10

route

Click here to down load 36 mile Alysham Cromer loop GPX file for your GPS

Urgent Mystery Engagement. (Post Office and Cafe, Guist)

Post Office and Cafe,

Guist,

Opening times Mon-Sat 09:30-16:30,

Sun 09:00-16:00,  

Recommended 

As I have now been to nearly 150 cafes in the region it is getting harder to find new venues within easy cycling distance as most options are at least a 50 mile round trip from Crusader Towers. Fortunately I'm currently in training for another Ironman triathlon (yawn, yawn) so need to do as much cycling as possible, however as I always need a cycling guest to accompany me I'm in danger of burning them out if I don't use them wisely on the longer trips.

Therefore, after giving him two weeks off, I opted to invite Andrew (who is notoriously hard to please) to join me on a 52 mile ride out to the Post Office and Cafe at Guist. He was happy to do the ride as long as he was back by 2:30pm for an urgent mystery engagement. I calculated that based on the following over optimistic assumptions we would make it easily

Over optimistic assumptions

1. We would average a better than normal speed, 
2. We would have no punctures 
3. We would have a shorter than normal cafe stop 

There was a strong wind today making it hard going and over optimistic assumption 1 was soon blown away, literally. I then mistakenly took us down a short stretch of off road path where, not surprisingly, Andrew got a puncture so my second over optimistic assumption was also consigned to the planning bin. To hit the target I was now relying on a very quick cafe stop indeed.

Andrew breaking over optimistic assumption 2

After 26 miles into the wind we arrived at Guist Post Office tired, hungry and very much behind schedule for Andrew's urgent mystery engagement.

Outside Guist Post Office and cafe

We went inside and found the cafe area at the back of the post office with a number of indoor tables and chairs plus a sofa seating option. Before making out seating choice it was to the contour to check out the cakes and award the effective cake selection (ECS) score.

To my horror there was only one slice of lemon drizzle cake (LDC) on display. After further discussion it appeared there had been a run on both cake and flapjack sales that morning which had apparently been 'crazy'. However as they could see our obvious disappointment we were informed that if we waited there was a second LDC (this time a gluten free version) just out of the oven but it would need to cool down before it could be iced and served. As we were both in need of the energy giving powers of cake then over optimistic assumption 3 now bit the dust too.

Smallest qualifying ECS todate

After having to award such a low ECS mark the pressure was on the drinks but I was very impressed when offered a choice of hot chocolate chocolate strength, I opted for the strongest 82% and was excited to see it being made from real chocolate chips. When it arrived I wasn't disappointed as it was large, strong, hot and very chocolaty. So after getting the equal lowest ECS score Guist Post office and cafe had now also got the equal highest hot chocolate quality (HCQ) mark. 

Drinks that were so good I forgot to photograph them until half drunk

Andrew found his cappuccino to be a good one too but despite our drinks being nice and hot, and therefore taking a while to drink and savour, we still had a bit of a wait before the two types of lemon drizzle cake arrived. I did a taste comparison and despite the fact I like a bit of gluten in my cake the gluten free one was the lighter and fluffier option of the two good examples of LDC presented to us.

Two types of LDC to try

The Guist post office and cafe had been on an emotional roller coaster hitting highs and lows but it was a really enjoyable visit and I recommend a visit if only for the hot chocolate alone.

Cycling guest cycling top tip no 46. If you have an urgent mystery engagement at the end of your ride then make sure you check your cycling host has allowed plenty of contingency so you get home in time.

As we set off back home I had to admit to Andrew that I had not followed cycling guest cycling top tip no 46 and even if we cycled a very fast 26 miles we were unlikely to get back in time. I questioned him further on his urgent mystery engagement to see if there was anything I could do to help now we would definitely be late.

He told me he had to get home to prepare a Moroccan tagine as they were having guests round. I asked him what time it needed to be in the oven and he confessed about 5.00pm. I did the math and calculated that he had allowed himself 2 hours to chop a few vegetables and apricots. I helpful told him that his forecast chopping time seemed excessive to me and I suggested he would be fine if he just chopped a bit quicker. 

With the help of the wind we still hammered it back and it looked like we would only be 15 minutes late when Andrew once again broke over optimistic assumption 2 with his second puncture, this time only half a mile from home. I left him to walk back and suggested he would have to forego any plans for an afternoon nap and hoped his chopping skills would save the day. I optimistically assume they did.

Scores based on 2 visits

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
9.50	7.75	3.75	7.50	6.50	7.00

Route

Click here to download 52 mile Norwich Guist loop gpx file to your gps device

Bacon sandwich time. (Peacock cafe, Gressenhall)

Peacocks Cafe,

Gressenhall,

Now Closed Down

Yesterday I had planned a cafe cycle ride based on the weather forecast in order that we would have the wind in our favour on the way back. However when I awoke and checked the BBC weather app the wind had chosen to make a 180 degree u-turn and would now be against us on our return.

I was forced to put my 'change to a cafe cycling route' process into full swing and after filling in the relevant forms I presented an alternative ride to the emergency cycle cafe route change committee who rejected my new proposal on a technicality. I was therefore forced to tell my cycling guest, Big George, to prepare himself for a hard slog home after our cafe stop.

Big George was in an unusually good mood as it was the first time this year he would be riding in the sunshine. As he is Scottish the merest glimpse of the sun causes him to put his shorts on and today was no exception with his legs on full display, a real treat for the ladies he declared.

Big Georges legs out on show

On the ride out to our destination the wind couldn't seem to make it's mind up as to which direction to blow in and we couldn't tell if it had helped our hindered us as we arrived at Corners garden centre near Gressinghall and found Peacocks cafe at just after midday.

Outside Peacock cafe

There is some outdoor seating but despite it being sunny and apparently shorts weather I still thought it was a bit chilly so we went inside. The first thing I spotted was the cake selection and a sign next to them saying Bacon sandwiches were available until 12:00. I pointed this out to Big George, who is fond of a fried sandwich, as we had just missed out as it was now 12:10. The staff looked at me as if I was mad and said he could have a Bacon sandwich. I wasn't having it as I'm a stickler from the rules and pointed to their sign with a questioning look. They confirmed that the sign was correct as they do stop doing bacon sandwiches at 12:00 when the lunchtime menu kicks in but as bacon sandwiches are also on the lunchtime menu he could still have one. So he ordered a fried egg sandwich instead (which wasn't on any menu).

Feeling a little confused by the Peacock cafe's bacon sandwich serving time policy I decided to check the cakes and award the effective cake selection (ECS) score. The selection had a decent range so I awarded a decent ECS mark.

Cake selection

I ordered hot chocolate and carrot cake while Big George had a Latte and lemon drizzle cake to go with his fried egg sandwich.

Our hot drinks

Big George thought his coffee was very good and strong but my hot chocolate was of the disappointing cadburys drinking chocolate variety. Our cakes were nice and big although both a little too sweet for our ageing taste buds.

Large bits of cake

While we waited for Big George's Fried egg sandwich two more customers came in. The first thing one said to the other was that it was a shame she was too late for a Bacon sandwich before it being explained to her that it was ok as she could order it off the lunchtime menu. I decided this must happen a lot and it would probably save time and confusion if they changed the sign to say that Bacon sandwiches were available all day.

After Big George had finished his fried egg sandwich we set off back home doing some fast bits and slow bits depending on which way the still confused wind was deciding to blow. The sun had also packed up for the day but I'm hoping to be able to get my legs on show on a ride soon.

Scores

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
5.50	8.00	6.00	6.50	5.75	6.35

Route


Click here to down load 45 mile Norwich Gressenhall loop gpx file to your gps

On the Buses. (Blakeys Bus Cafe, Mulbarton)

Blakeys Bus Cafe,

Mulbarton,

Opening times Mon-Fri 09:30-16:00

Sat 09:30-15:30

Recommended 

After the Easter storm, when Chris (Mrs Crusader) asked not to be given any chocolate eggs then ate all mine instead, it was good that things had calmed down enough for us to go on a cafe cycle ride today.

The word out on the cafe street was that a new venture had recently opened in the nearby village of Mulbarton and, more interestingly, it was bus based. I therefore felt this would make an ideal venue for a 30 mile ride today.

Once kitted up and out on our bikes we found that we had to work pretty hard as despite the course being a loop we seemed to be cycling into the wind most of the time. With the cafe stop coming towards the end of the loop we were both pretty tired and in need of refreshments as we pulled into Mulbarton and found Blakeys Cafe Bus parked up near the common.

Arriving at Blakeys Cafe Bus

As you can see the cafe is actually a Bus. It is permanently parked there so sadly not available to be taken on a Cliff Richard style summer holiday (ask your parents). As we arrived my cafe skills came to the fore as I heard a party of mothers and young daughters heading across the car park towards us. I knew we had to beat them inside so as to get our order in first or potential have a long wait. Without a moment to be lost we quickly dumped our bikes in the pleasant looking outdoor seating area and headed in to secure our seat on board as the bus cafe was clearly busy today.

Outdoor seating area where we dumped our bikes

We were greeted by a waitress/conductor next to the downstairs kitchen and shown upstairs were all the indoor seating is. On the way up the stairs we went past a good looking cake selection with some special Easter based cakes leading me to award a good effective cake selection (ECS) mark.

Cake selection fridge on the bus stairs

Having never been in a bus based cafe before it was hard to know what sort of atmosphere and ambiance (AAA) score to give. The staff were extremely friendly and helpful and there were good views over the common, but buses are not that big so it felt a little cramped however the longer I was there the more I warmed to it so eventually gave a good AAA score.

Upstairs on the bus overlooking the common

On the drinks front my Hot Chocolate and Chris's Mocha were both nice but could have both been a bit stronger for top marks. 

Todays drinks

To make sure I did get to eat something Easter based this year I opted for chocolate Easter cake while Chris went for Coffee and Walnut. When they arrived I made sure I ate all the chocolate decorations on my cake before Chris had a chance to spot any and make me hand them over. Both our cakes were good and I especially liked the fresh fruit garnish and choice of cream (pouring, clotted, whipped) that came with it.

Cakes with nice fruit garnish

Blakeys bus cafe is certainly a welcome addition to the local cafe scene and it was great to see it so busy. I certainly recommend a visit if you want something a bit different from your standard cafe venue.

Once home I finished my letter to the Easter Bunny to make sure he ignores any 'No Easter Eggs for me' nonsense from Mrs Crusader next year.

Scores based on last 3 visits (last one 11/03/22)

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.00	7.1	7.15	7.40	7.10	6.95

Today's route

Click link to download 30 mile Norwich Poringland gpx file for your GPS

Closing time. (Artemis cafe, Cley Next the sea)

Artemis Cafe,

Cley Next The Sea,

Opening times Mon-Sat 10:00-17:00,

Sun 11:00-16:00  

Highly Recommended 

Looking at my cafe locations map I have noticed that the North Norfolk area appears to be a hotspot for top rated cafes. So as today was time for a ride from Hard to Please House in Alysham it seemed like a good opportunity to visit a new cafe in that vicinity. To spice things up a bit I had given today's cycling guest Andrew (who is notoriously hard to please) three possible destinations to choose from and put him in charge of the route so where we would be going would be a mystery to me.

I was a little late setting off to the start point as my normal bike had developed a last minute fault and I had to get my reserve bike prepared instead. My reserve bike is the only bike I own that has a name, thanks to an ill judged naming competition I organised on my Twitter feed last year. So with Bikey Mcbikeface finally loaded in the back of the car I set off to Hard to Please House ready to find out where we would be going.

On arrival Andrew said he would like to keep me guessing as to our final destination before leaping on his bike and charging off towards the Norfolk Coast with me struggling behind as I got used to riding Bikey Mcbikeface once more. Andrew explained we would have to ride quickly as according to the cafe website it shuts at 1pm today.

I was worried that Andrew had not stuck to the brief and would be taking us to Holt, his default destination, so I was mighty relieved when we went past there and out to Cley next the Sea where we found  one of my options, Artemis Cafe.

Artemis Cafe in Cley Next the Sea

We had pedalled hard and arrived at about 12:30, well before the potential closing time. On arrival I was instantly impressed by the outdoor seating area that over looks the marshes. There were even some outdoor sofas.

Outdoor seating area

It was a bit chilly so we went inside to the cosy indoor tables. The whole set up plus the very friendly welcome gave an extremely high atmosphere and ambiance (AAA) rating.

I checked out the cake selection which had a good range but fairly small leading to a reasonable effective cake selection (ECS) score. 

Good solid selection of cakes

I ordered some zucchini and lime cake to go with my hot chocolate and Andrew had a cappuccino and millionaire style shortbread. As it was lunchtime, and although it isn't cake, I also treated myself to a sausage roll, which was super.

Our food and drinks soon arrived and we were both very impressed with our drinks especially when, as a nice touch, the chocolate sprinkles were added at the table to our personal taste, a bit like the pepper at a posh pizza restaurant. It was an excellent hot chocolate with a really good chocolate taste and Andrew thought his coffee was top draw too although he would have liked it to be slightly hotter.

Driks just after chocolate sprinkles were added

Andrew had started his biscuit early and already said it was very good. I tried my cake and which was superb and the best zucchini and lime cake I could remember having (and I have tried several). For a second opinion I asked Andrew(who is notoriously hard to please) if he would like to taste some. He wasn't sure if he would like zucchini in his cake and wondered if it would be better to make it using courgette instead. However once he had had a piece he was blown away and thought it was one of the best cakes ever.

Great cakes

All in all Artemis cafe had proved another North Norfolk winner and went straight into my current top five. With a larger cake selection it could easily have gone to number one and I highly recommend a visit and look forward to returning soon.

View from outdoor seating area over the marshes

It was now gone one o'clock so I was impressed they were still open and seemed in no hurry to throw us out. I asked the owner if he was looking forward to closing early today for Easter. He looked at me like I was an idiot with a 'why would I close early over the busy Easter period' expression. I explained that Andrew had seen they were closing early on their website. He was unaware of this and said that today was the day they switched to summer opening times. He was now worried that there would be no customers this afternoon so went off to contact the Artemis Cafe IT Director, who was also the barista, to find out what was going on. Andrew suggested he may have made a mistake so we quickly left before we started any more rumours..

Now I had re established my riding relationship with Bikey Mcbikeface we made good progress on the return ride home. Once back at Crusader Towers I checked out the Artemis cafe website where there was no sign of there ever being an early closing time today. Either the IT director had quickly corrected things or more likely, Andrew had looked at another of today's possible cafes websites and got confused, again.

Scores based on 3 visits

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
8.6	8.17	6.35	8.92	8.58	8.12

route

Click here to download 37 mile Alysham Wiveton loop gpx file for your GPS

Cake Crusader Sportive 20. (36 mile via Piece of Cake at Coltishall)

Sportive 20,

A Piece of Cake,

Opening times Mon-Sat 09:00-16:00,

Sun 09:30-15:30

Highly Recommended 

Yesterday saw the 2nd official Cake Crusader sportive of the year. Due to injury and apathy only 8 of the 10 participants who had entered turning up at race HQ for pre ride faffing about. There was a lack of cafe reviewing experience in the group today with Dan (33), James (36) and Tom (13) (collectively known as the young lads) all on only their second cafe cycle ride.

A lot of inexperience in today's group

The trip was a 36 mile loop round Norwich up to a Piece of Cake (I see what they have done there) at Coltishall. It was no surprise that with such a mixed group of riders the Peleton was well spread and it took all my cat herding experience to try and keep us on route. Only occasionally did I loose a rider or the leaders head off in the wrong way. I was therefore quite exhausted when we arrived at our destination.

Demonstrating their inexperience the group headed inside without anyone waiting to have the compulsory cafe arrival photo. I therefore had to settle for one of their bikes only. 

Bikes minus riders on arrival at a Piece of Cake

Fortunately after visiting nearly 200 cafes my cafe cycle skills came to the fore as despite being last through the door I was able to review and rate the cake selection and then get to the front of the queue to place my order before the amateurs had finished floundering as to what to have or how to pay.

The cake selection was excellent and had a lot of tempting ones on offer leading to a high effective cake selection (ECS) mark.

Part of the cake selection

With orders placed we took our seats on the third of three levels all of which overlook the river through a big window. The group collectively were very impressed giving a high Atmosphere and Ambiance (AAA) score.

view of cafe from middle layer

Once the food and drinks arrived I foolishly tried to illicit some rating activity but time and again the inexperience showed, especially from the young lads. 

Cake and drink reviewing in action

James tried to award his cup of tea more than a 7 which is the known ceiling of guest hot drink quality (GHDQ) a cup of tea can have. Tom wanted to rate his Paninni when a Paninni is clearly not cake, then once again Ali asked if he could dock marks as his latte came in a vase and not a cup (the vessel plays no part in GHDQ). When asked for ratings the young lads gave me responses like 'lovely', 'nice', 'tasty' etc. Was I meant to guess how these related to an actual score in order to enter in to my cafe ratings spreadsheet? I need numbers! In the end I once again had to ignore the young lads input as it was clear they didn't really have a clue as to what was going on. I blame the parents.

However despite this, all the ratings I did collect were even higher than on my last visit (see Road safety) establishing a piece of cake as one of my top cafe destinations. I was also pleased that the cake had not been served on the serviettes as it had been last time so another success in my campaign (#keepcakeoffserviettes).

The way back was equally chaotic and with rating done I quickly lost interest on making sure the whole party was kept together for the return ride home leaving every one for themselves. I assume they all made it back safely but will probably only find out when I see who turns up for the next sportive in a few weeks time.

Scores for a Piece of Cake based on 2 visits

Hot Choc Quality	Guest Hot Drink Quality	Effective Cake Selection	Cake Quality	Ambiance and Atmosphere	Café Rating
6.5	7.5	7.75	7.25	8.5	7.50

Route

Click here to download 36 mile Norwich Coltishall loop gpx mile to your GPS